I used to do my briskets in the oven. However for ease of being able to put a meal on in the morning, go to work, and have it ready to go that night when I get home, I switched over to using a slow cooker. What I’ve found though is that the flavour of my briskets doesn’t pop nearly as much when slow cooked.
So after a lot of trial and error I have a recipe that works. And the best bit is that it doesn’t take too much prep so you can still prepare it and set it going before going out for the day!
Ingredients:
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 large yellow onion
1.5kg beef brisket
Salt
Freshly ground black pepper
6 cloves garlic, minced
2 cups beef stock
2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
1 tablespoon soy sauce
Method:
*Slice onion into thin half moons. Put the olive oil in the pan and slowly caramelize on a low heat, then set aside.
*Put the brisket in the frypan and sear on both sides.
*Make up 2 cups of beef stock. Mix in the two tables of Worcestershire sauce and the 1 tablespoon of soy sauce.
*Place the brisket in the slow cooker, fat side up, and season with salt and pepper. Take the minced garlic and spread it over the top of the brisket.
*Pour in the beef stock mixture.
*Put in the onions, on top and around the brisket.
*Cook on low heat for 6 – 8 hours (depending on brisket size)
*Leave on warm for half an hour before serving.
And that’s it! A really simple yet really delicious way to add a bunch more flavour to your briskets.
Well Scott, it’s not as glamorous as you might think, nor as easy. One does not simply show up to the station with a box of CD’s and a laptop of downloaded songs ready to go. It takes a lot of work and preparation throughout the day to get ready for that evening’s performance.
To answer your question best, let me take you through a typical day leading up to that night’s broadcast of The Big DJ Trev Show:
6 to 9 Thursdays on KRRfm
7am – Wake up. Groan. Scratch. Roll over. Go back to sleep.
9am – Wake up. Groan. Scratch. Get up. Brought Irish Coffee by butler.
9.30am – Breakfast: Bacon, Eggs, Sausages, Black Pudding, Hash Brown, Mushrooms, Toast, more Coffee. Tell butler to give the groupies in my bed cab fare and send them on their way.
10am – Go to toilet. Read papers to check for interesting news stories to discuss on tonight’s show.
10.30am – Reflect upon how I am so much more knowledgeable and such a superior writer to every journalist in every newspaper everywhere. Finish going to toilet.
11am – Personal Assistant opens and reads out my fan mail. For those who have sent cash/Transformers/nude photos tell assistant to send them 8×10 glossies and autograph them on my behalf.
12pm – Limo arrives to take me for working lunch with Agent at All-you-can-eat BBQ Rib Joint. Half- listen to latest round of offers of movie roles, television spots, celebrity appearances and book deals. Endure constant flirtations from busty 19-yo waitress as she brings plate after plate of ribs.
12.30pm – Hit Agent over head with whiskey bottle when suggestion made of doing a Reality TV Show with Sophie Monk. Agent grovels and apologizes profusely. Get fellated by waitress.
2pm – Ribbon Cutting at new Hospital Wing in my name. Inform Agent (still bleeding) to keep all sick people at least 20 feet from my position or else its Whiskey Bottle Time again – Agent rushes off to inform bodyguards. Plaster smile on my face as photographs taken, hands shook and fans scream my name.
‘Can I go anywhere without fans adoring me? I’m entitled to a private life too dammit!’
4pm – Meet with personal trainer. Told yet again should not be smoking and drinking on treadmill. Tell trainer yet again to go fornicate himself and throw beer bottle at him. Personal Trainer apologises and goes to find bandages.
5pm – Dinner: 1.2kg Tomahawk Steak with garlic mushroom sauce, sides of mash potatoes and roasted corn on the cob. Pedicure whilst eating and assistant reads through celebrity guest list for tonight’s show.
5.30pm – Chopper ride to Radio Station. Fussed over by the ladies from wardrobe, hair and makeup.
‘How do you get to work – a car? Pfff… peasants’
5.57pm -Moment of crippling self-doubt in dressing room, knowing that I’m a sham who makes his fortune off playing the music of real artists.
5.58pm – Shot of the brown stuff, snort of the white stuff.
And NOW we are ready to rock!
5.59pm – Walk through station to Broadcast Booth. Clapping from all sides whilst bodyguards clear a path.
6pm – Showtime!
I hope this answers your question Scott, and that you enjoyed a sneak peak behind the scenes of what hard-working prep I go to each week to bring you the sparkling entertainment you have all come to expect and enjoy. And remember folks, you can listen to The Big DJ Trev Show every Thursday night from 6 to 9pm on KRR.fm.
Rejoice lovers of free speech and insane rambling everywhere, for here we are – the 5th anniversary of the Big Angry Trev blog!
Lets Party Yo!
Who would have thought bigangrytrev.com would still be running strong after half a decade eh! Does it mean I am a talented writer whose turn of phrase brings literary delight to you all, or simply that you all are gluttons for punishment – the jury is still out on that one.
It’s been a fun 5 years and a great creative outlet for yours truly. There have been times where I couldn’t stop blogging and other times I would struggle to come up with one post a month. Likewise there have been times where the site has had thousands of hits in a day, yet other times the traffic has been so slow it might as well have been Rylstone on a Tuesday afternoon. However the site has continued to grow and expand from a few different topics to a dozen categories – be it Hobby Farming, Meat ConsumptionorTransformer Talk, with there now being hundreds upon hundreds of posts for your reading and viewing pleasure.
The ultimate reviewer of meats in action!
The blog has had some great successes. The story about a Redback Spider killing a Blind Snake(which turned out to be a legless lizard) was picked up bylocal Victorian newspapers and even the television news! Some of my Transformer reviews have been picked up and shared by the major TF sites overseas such as TFW2005 and Seibertron. For a while there I was receiving free merchandise from Hasbro to review regarding the Transformers Trading Card Game and even given a fewworld exclusive card reveals! Ah, free Transformer merchandise – if only that had extended to toys we would have probably paid off our mortgage by now.
One of several reveals exclusive to BigAngryTrev.com courtesy of Hasbro and WOTC
Of course it’s not been all high’s. I’ve had people vehemently disagree with my blog, despite it’s relatively non-offensive content. I’ve had people completely misconstrue my meaning so they think I’m supporting what I am actually mocking (satire is a foreign concept to some). There have been several cyber-attacks which necessitated the purchase of some high-level malware and spam protection. For a while I couldn’t share links to the blog on Social Media due to Mr. Zuckerberg and Mr. Morrison having a spat. I’ve even had one threat of litigation; despite my lawyer saying I was legally safe he also said it probably wasn’t worth the headache to fight. As Ricky Gervais says: ‘no matter what you say, it’s going to offend somebody somewhere’.
The average reaction of your modern day internet user when reading something that doesn’t 100% gel with their world view
So I’d like to thank all the thousands of people who have read my blog over the past 5 years. Whether you’ve been reading about the idiocy of my youth inTales of the Trev, checking out my latestTransformer Toy Reviews and Fan Interviews or simply enjoyed one of my infrequent videos, its been wonderful to have an international audience to share the bubbling mess that is my inner thought processes with. But there are also some specific people I need to thank:
*Thanks to my in-laws Matt & Jo for suggesting starting a blog in the first place.
*Thanks to Ozformers and its founder Griffin for letting me continue to post links on his site
Thanks to Hasbrofor the freebies to review (I’d like some more please!).
*Thanks most of all to my wife who has been kind enough to keep the kids out of my hair long enough in order to put finger to keyboard on occasion. She also kindly overlooks the fact that in order to keep advertising off my site the blog is a sinkhole for money rather than a cash cow. Who knows, maybe if I increase my readership by 500% it might be worth putting up an ad or two – get your friends to start reading so I can quit my job and do this full time! Who knows – might even get around to writing that novel the missus has been telling me to for years.
‘I could totally stay home and be an author – I’ve already got the self-satisfied pretension down to a fine art!
So many thanks everyone and to you dear readers – here’s to the next 5 years! If ever there is something new you would like featured on this site don’t hesitate to post a comment about it – I’m always looking for something new to talk about. If you’ve got an Ask Trevquestion on any topic or just an issue you’d like to hear aRandom Rantabout don’t be shy. Keep up to date with when new posts are put up by joining the Facebook sites Big Angry Trev! & Big Angry Trev’s Transformatorium, or simply create an account here to keep you update!. And don’t forget during those times I have writers block you can still catch me on the Big DJ Trev Show on Krrfm.org.au to get your weekly dose of warped Trev logic, insane rants and good tunes!
Living in a tiny town like Rylstone it is very much the case that there is only a finite amount of places to go out to eat. For great Mexican there is always Pepino’sand for a decent burger there is The Globe. However there are not many other venues, let alone secluded little café’s the romance the object of your affections.
This Valentines Day I did something that I don’t usually do. Being a relatively blokey Hobby Farmer I tend to stick to only 3 drinks in my life: coffee, water and beer. Wine does not come up on my radar except for something I sometimes I have to drink a glass of at weddings. There is red that gives me a headache, and white that I find bearable. There is the extend of my grand knowledge of crushed grapes. So I don’t generally do Wineries.
So this Valentines’ Day I stepped out of my comfort zone and took my wife to one of the few other places to eat around here – Naked Lady Vineyard.
First off, – misleading name for the place. Upon arrival, unlike Confest, there were no naked ladies. Not a one! No nubile wenches bereft of clothing lying around on a chaise’lounge or splashing about in fountains. It was in fact a lovely little winery a few minutes outside of Rylstone with a big barnlike structure in the center. So whilst there were no naked women, at least it meant I could look about in a relaxed fashion without my wife saying ‘Are you staring at that woman’s breasts?!’
Wine tasting was $5. For that you get to taste 5 or so different wines on the menu, and if you buy a bottle that $5 is taken off the price. My wife quite enjoyed doing this and I did try a glass myself, even if only I could go for the cheap laugh of sniffing it, swilling it around in my mouth and then looking for a bucket to spit it into.
My wife ended up purchasing two wines. I tried the white which was very nice. The red (according to her) was nice too. And… um… it was wine? Phew! Pushed my wine knowledge to the hilt with that one!
What goes well with wine? Cheese apparently. What goes well with cheese? MEAT! Though to be fair meat goes well with everything (I always thought Vegans might be happier if they wrapped their soy burgers in a bit of bacon). And much like Bootleggers, you could order a platter for two that had multiple cheeses and at least four kind of meat.
Classed as an Antipasto Platter (I’ve always been pro-pasto but that’s just me) this platter came with spicy chorizo, huge slices of cured ham, prosciutto and salami slices. It came with a variety of cheeses with varying bite, as well as pickles, chutneys, olives, strawberries, crackers and freshly baked bread goods.
Despite having swapped to beer at this point (they had 3 standard varieties) all of this did go very well hand in hand with the wines on offer. Indeed my wife and I quite happily grazed on the platter for nearly an hour as we chatted, drank, enjoyed the peaceful surrounds and the rare treat of each other’s company without our kids in tow.
So if you are a meat enthusiast, cheese enthusiast, wine enthusiast or even just want to have somewhere different to go to your usual pub or restaurant, I highly recommend Naked Lady Vineyard. And who knows, buy your partner enough bottles of vino and you might get to see a naked lady after all 😉
Never in all our years together have I felt such a sense of betrayal resulting from the actions of my spouse.
No, she didn’t cheat on me. No, she didn’t spend our savings on something extravagant for herself. No she hasn’t been saying awful things about me behind my back to her friends and family. She hasn’t even stopped me ordering this months shipment of Transformers.
The near-unspeakable act she committed was…. wait for it…. telling our son we could have at least one vegetarian dinner a week!
I know – pretty shameful behaviour right?
“What did she just say?!”
We are a decision sharing household and whilst both my wife and I have autonomy to make decisions, we usually do so safe in the knowledge that the other would agree with our actions.
But the other night when we were eating dinner, my son asked what vegetarianism is, as he has encountered the concept since starting Primary School. So we explained to him what it was. He then asked if we could have a vegetarian dinner. Without batting an eyelid, without looking to me to see if I was on board, she replied “Yeah we can have a vegetarian dinner. In fact we can have one every week”.
My jaw hit the dinner table, and not simply because I was stuffing rissoles into it. Did she just say what I thought she said?! Did she just make a unilateral decision regarding our family’s dietary requirements without consulting with me?
“Um… dear…” I said is a very guarded tone.
She looked at me, subtle amusement clear on her face, then repeated herself to our son that “yes, lets have vegetarian once a week”.
I was shocked! I was flabbergasted. And I tell you one thing…. this will not stand!
Now, let me say something from the outset – I have nothing against vegetarians. My entire adult life I have had vegetarian friends and sometimes eaten at their houses. Even went to a vegetarian restaurant in Melbourne for one of their birthdays once. The tofu tasted like bloody awful warmed-up gelatin but I still ate it.
From a sustainability viewpoint I think vegetarianism has a lot going for it, given you can generate a lot more food per acre from growing crops than from grazing livestock. You are going to feed the starving masses around the world a lot easier with rice than you are with lamb.
Plus I’ve always looked at Vegetarians the same way when young I looked at Gay Guys. Every two guys that decided to get together meant that there was two more women available for me to pursue. And like that, every person that decides to become a vegetarian means one less person competing for that prime steak in the butchers shop. Homosexuality, Vegetarianism – not lifestyles I subscribe to but of which I heartily approve.
But this is my dinnertable. And by gawd in this household at dinnertime we eat MEAT!
Try getting this level of satisfaction from a bowl of alfalfa sprouts
For those of you thinking I am being draconian in my viewpoint, consider the following:
Breakfast
We technically have vegetarian for breakfast 6 days a week. My son and wife have porridge, my daughter has toast and I have fruit. It’s only on a Sunday when I cook a big breakfast for the family that meat enters the realm of breakfast in our household.
Lunch
At lunchtime my kids have hardly any meat. My daughter has one slice of shaved ham in her ham-and-cheese sandwich. My son has two slices. Besides that it’s all cheese, bread, fruit, crackers and my wife’s home-baked goods like banana bread. In fact, sometimes we make the kids organic free-range duck egg sandwiches which cuts out that bit of meat all together!
My wife packs salads for her lunch so she usually eats vegetarian, unless she puts some lean chicken in or something.
I usually take a frozen meal to work, as since I am so rushed making my kids lunches for Preschool & Primary School in the morning, I don’t have time to make any for myself. And anyone that has eaten those frozen meals know the companies are extremely frugal regarding how much meat they include.
So that is a tiny bit of meat for the family at lunchtime, vastly overshadowed by a plethora of non-meat products.
So, given that even if you combine the first two meals of the day, the meat intake of my family is miniscule, why the hell should we be eating vegetarian for our third meal as well?!
Well, I can tell ya right now – we won’t be! I never cook an all meat meal, why should I cook an all vegetarian meal? Is that fair? Is that just? Is that a balanced diet? No, no it is not!
Every meal I cook has non-meat products in it. If I cook Indian there is rice, coriander, naan bread and pappadums. If I cook Thai there are Asian vegetables and noodles. If I cook Italian there is pasta sauce, wholemeal pasta and garlic bread. If I cook your average Aussie Meat & 3 Veg, there is indeed 3 Veg. In fact I usually put in four of five!
Chef extraordinaire
And yes there is meat. And yes there is usually a lot of meat. And on my plate in particular there is admittedly a LOT of meat! But it’s not all there is. Again, as tempting as it is I never cook an all-meat meal (for a really great all-meat meal though, check out this recipe!).
So I’m putting my foot down. There will be no vegetarian meals at dinnertime in our household. None, zip, zippo, nada, naught! There will always be meat. Lamb, Pork, Venison, Chicken, Beef, Seafood – whatever. It will be there on the plate for all to enjoy. Someone doesn’t like it, they can push it to the side of their plate. Good luck with that since my daughter is a little carnivore and my son, the one who asked about having vegetarian meals in the first place, complains almost every night about having to finish his veggies. I can’t see them pushing all that meaty goodness to one side so as to have more room for broccoli.
My wife cooks about once a month. I, as the househusband(who now also works 4 days a week AND looks after the farm) am the primary chef and it will be a cold day in hades before I start cooking meals of a night that don’t have a big slab of animal flesh included! We are carnivores, our eyes are in front in order to judge the distance to our prey – eating meat is natural and healthy and it is how humanity evolved. I firmly believe we developed an opposable thumb so we could go out and club mammoths in order to have Flintstone-sized steaks back in the cave. Humanity would not have survived as a species if our ancestors had said ‘Oh I think I’ll just have a light salad’. I treat my gut like Noah’s Ark, it is my fervent hope that by the end of my life it will contain at least two of every animal. And making one 7th of my weekly dinners vegetarian may well ruin that dream. Surely my wife can’t want to destroy my dreams can she? Doesn’t she love me the way I love her?
A plate of Flying Fox in Vanuatu. It was… unique.
As far as I’m concerned my wife can cook vegetarian when it’s her turn to cook. I’ll just require adequate notice so that I can have a bunch of bacon on hand to add to mine.
Got something to add? Pop it in the comments section below!
Is there any parent out there who doesn’t have trouble getting their kids to eat healthy? Or getting them to eat everything on their plate?
The little buggers always seem to have their tastebuds geared towards sugar, or if not then selectively whatever you don’t have to hand. And if, like me, you have two of them at home it can be double the frustration as what one likes the other hates. It makes feeding them a nightmare!
Well, while dinner times might still be an onerous chore for their mother and I, I have at least figured out a way to get them to eat their lunch with nary a complaint every single day. No, I haven’t given in and let them have junk food, I have discovered the Power of the Platter!
Yep, no more making sandwiches they only eat half of. No more trying to get fruit down their gobs only for them to whine “I don’t wanna!” By giving them a wide selection of tucker to choose from, making sure it’s all near bite size and letting them pick what they eat first and at their own pace, I find they end up eating most everything! Plus when they get bored of one ingredient, you just swap it out for another with minimal fuss.
Let’s have a look at a platter I made for my son:
And now one for my daughter:
To ensure they are getting all the nutrients their little bodies need I always make sure to put in:
(Cubed Cheddar Cheese, Sliced Tasty Cheese, Occasional tub of Yoghurt, Glass of Milk)
*At least one kind of meat
(Sliced Ham, Sliced Chicken, Tuna)
*At least one kind of plain cracker (even plain ones are seen as a treat!) and/or piece of non-white bread.
I also find that it pays to put in one (cheap) food that you know they are not really keen on. For my kids that’s sultanas – they don’t hate them but don’t really love them either. By putting that on their plate and then ‘letting them off’ from eating it, it gives them a feeling of ownership in deciding what they do and do not consume from their platters. That sense of control means they eat the rest more eagerly without it seeming like a chore to them.
By following this pattern, and changing up the ingredients used, it’s turned into a very effective way of getting a bit of everything my kids need to eat into their bellies each lunchtime without it becoming a major battle. I hope it works for you too!
Got any other tips on how to get kids to eat healthy? Would love to read them in the comments section below!
Who doesn’t love a big roast eh? Well, vegetarians I guess, and people with eating disorders, those in a coma etc… well, lots of people. But lots more people love a roast, especially in winter!
Be still your beating taste buds
So here is a simple recipe for Roast Lamb with Vegetables that is certain to fill your tum. All the ingredients will be seasoned in various themes of yummy goodness but I’ve even made that easy too. Just follow the below instructions below and eat hearty!
Ingredients:
1.5kg roasting lamb
4 medium potatoes
1 medium onion
1 large carrot
Frozen peas
Olive oil
Salt & Pepper
Minced garlic
Rosemary
Mild Paprika
Honey
Balsamic Vinegar
Preparation:
Peel & quarter the potatoes and the onion
Peel the large carrot and cut into sticks
Take a mixing bowl and fill the bottom with a mixture of olive oil, salt and pepper
Put the oven on to preheat to 180 degrees
Seasoning:
One by one take each of the ingredients (the lamb, potatoes, carrots & onion) and roll them around in the mixture of oil, salt and pepper. Sit each to one side.
Mix up some minced garlic and rosemary and rub generously all over the lamb.
Roll potatoes in mild paprika
Roll carrots in honey and place in fridge
Pour balsamic vinegar in a small bowl and put onions in to soak. Place in fridge.
Method:
Place lamb in roasting tray that allows circulation of heat all around the lamb. Set timer for 90 minutes.
At the 45 minute mark put the potatoes on an oven tray and place in oven
At the 60 minute mark put the carrots on a separate tray and place in oven (otherwise all the honey that slides off will contaminate your potatoes and obscure the paprika seasoning)
At the 70 minute mark place the onion in next to the potatoes.
At the 80 minute mark put some peas on to boil
Serving
Cut the lamb into nice slices or chunks (depending on your culinary audience) using an electric knife and place on plate.
Divvy up the vegetables, providing some butter
You can provide gravy if you like, though with all the seasoning it shouldn’t be necessary
Enjoy!
And there ya go. A roast recipe to warm the cockles of you and your families gullets this winter. Happy eating!
Got your own roast lamb recipe? Would love to read it in the comments section below!
I am a total fan of combining meats. Despite my rather disastrous ’14 meats stew’ I tried to make a decade ago, I persevere with trying different combos to see what fleshes of what animals will complement each other on the palette.
Given this carnivorous mindset, I was therefore very happy in my wanderings to come across the E-I-E-I-O Burger.
The meats that dreams are made of…
That’s right – deep-fried chicken, double beef patties, double bacon and triple cheese! These people don’t muck about! Old McDonald’s farm must be looking pretty sparse after they made a few of these babies! The ingredients were all done to perfection: the deep-fried chicken was not oily like it had just come out of a KFC or something, the patties were big and juicy and definitely home made in the good way, the bacon was plentiful, the onions was grilled excellently, the lettuce was thankfully negligible and the tomato was, due to special request, non-existent.
I was very pleased that they remembered to leave the tomato off as so many places either refuse, or otherwise forget, to make any alterations one asks for (I’m looking at you BAB Burger makers). I’m not sure what the special sauce was except that it certainly shat all over whatever it is they use for a Big Mac. It had a slightly smoky flavour with just the right amount of bite and it was that plentiful that I found myself having to use a napkin on both my hands and mouth after each bite. Some may see that as a negative – I see it as a sign of a chef who isn’t stingy!
You magnificent Frankenstien’s Monster of a burger you!
What can I say – to quote Mr Jackson This was a damn tasty burger! I mean it was REALLY friggin good! Unfortunately I didn’t have time to savor it properly as we were running late for Transformers 5 so had to gobble it. Given its size (much bigger than it appears in the above photo) this still took me 5 minutes of solid mastication. At $18 and considering it does not come with any sides whatsoever its not the cheapest burger but it’s that good I would happily lay out the cash again. If you find yourself in Greensborough Plaza in Melbourne then stop by Flame 400 near the cinema and gorge your tastebuds on a burger that has cow, chookand pig all under the same bun – you deserve it!
Eaten this burger before or have another one you think worthy of mention? Would love to hear about it in the comments section below!
Today I will be taking a look at the BAB Burger – billed as for The Big Eaters.
This burger made up 100% of the options for ‘Big Eaters’ so if you don’t like beef you are out of luck
Available at the Commercial Hotel in Swan Hill, this burger comes in at the cost of $23 so I was expecting that it would be substantial (I’m guessing BAB stands for Big Arse Burger) and was not disappointed. However the size of this burger is really the only notable thing about it.
Presentation and Customization
A tower of beef!
First of all, I asked for my burger sans tomato and beetroot and as you can see from the picture above this was apparently too much effort for the chef, though he did remove the relish that I had wanted. Also as you can see from the photo there were four chips (well – 3 and a broken one) sticking out at an odd angle at the bottom of the burger on one side. However when looking at the rest the chips on the plate, one realized that they were not put in the burger on purpose, but must have just got caught up in its construction as the other chef dumped the chips on the plate.
The Eating
No burger too big!
Despite the pic above, this burger was too big to eat with the hands in a restaurant (you could probably get away with it at a truck stop cafe or something) so you had to disassemble it and eat it with a knife and fork. With double bacon, double cheese and the two huge patties there was certainly a lot to get through – you wont walk away hungry! However there was not a lot of taste to be found despite all the ingredients (they REALLY should not have left the relish off). The two patties were indeed huge in size, way more meat than you get with say a Mega Mac which boasts 4 patties, but they were made of cheap mince and quite bland. The underside of the buns were burnt and the egg yolk had disintegrated with the frying so tasted the same as the white. So a big burger, but every ingredient was either overdone or of such cheap quality that you’d need an electron microscope to search for the taste (for an example of how fine quality ingredients can make all the difference to a burger – read my review of the Cheeseworld Cheeseburger).
Overall
It’s a big burger and you get a decent amount of chips with it, so if your idea of a good feed is quantity over quality it is worth the $23 they charge. Again, you will not walk away from the table hungry after this. But if you are looking for something to dazzle your tastebuds or made to your particular specifications then definitely don’t bother with this. If you want quantity AND quality then try the meat at somewhere like The Kings Hotel.
Got something to add to the above or news of a great burger you would like to share? Pop it in the comments section below!
The culinary balancing act – tis a tightrope that any man who does his share of the cooking at home must walk. On the one hand you need to balance the needs of your wife or girlfriend (never invite both to the same meal – it can only lead to disaster) has in regards to dietary requirements against your need to not eat a meal that tastes like a rabbit took a fart in a meadow. This is not an easy task.
However it is doable. Today I’m going to give you an example using a very simple dish which you can then apply the principles of to other meals. Today we will look at Big Angry Trev’s His & Hers’ Bangers and Mash!
You will need:
*Four sausages
*2 rashers of bacon
*1 egg – duck for preference
*Onion Gravy mix
*Frozen Veggies – peas, corn & carrot
*4 potatoes
*Milk, grated cheddar cheese, butter
*A handful of parsley
*Salt & Pepper
*Cooking oil
Step 1: Boil the water, peel the potatoes and pop them in. Put the sausages on to fry in first frypan on a very low heat. Boil the kettle.
Step 2: Put the frozen veggies in a microwave safe container. Slice bacon rashers in half. Shred all parsley bar one sprig. Pop gravy mix in mixing jug.
Step 3: Flip sausages. Put oil in second frypan and put bacon on lowest possible heat.
Step 4: Drain potatoes. Add milk, butter, shredded parsley, salt, pepper and a handful of grated cheddar cheese. Mash the hell outta it! Flip bacon
Step 5: Remove sausages, add in duck egg. Remove bacon. Take one dollop of mashed spud and separate from the rest. Put rest of mashed potato in frypan and crank that sucker up!
Place small dollop of mashed potato on plate with one sliver of bacon artfully placed in a semi-circle against it. Place sausage apart from bacon, add the merest hint of onion gravy to the top. Take frozen vegetables and create an artful semi-circle on far side of plate. Finish off with a delightful sprig of fresh parsley for effect. Perhaps even provide a napkin and some subtle instrumental dining music as she partakes of your offering.
Your Dish
HIS!
Fry the f*ck out of the mashed spud and dump it on ya plate. Stick the three snags beside it. Chuck the bacon on the spud and the fried egg on the snags. Dump all the gravy on. Stick the veggies in a clump on the side to be eaten so the roughage means you can actually manage to take a shit the next day. Make sure the TV has the subtitles on so you can read the footy scores from the table while you shovel down ya tucker.
And there you go, a new take on a simple dish that will satisfy both you and your good lady. Yes, you will die a lot sooner than her of a heart attack, but you will have enjoyed your life a lot more.
Bon appé-f*ckin-tit!
Got a different take on this classic recipe? Would love to read it in the comments section below!
