Clones Archives - Big Angry Trev!

Today we have another question from Shannon in Pendle Hill:

‘When you have a Vicks VapoDrop lozenge, where does the mucus in your nose go? It just disappears!’

Well Shannon I must say, in this day and age of Pandemics, its nice to see someone still thinking about the common cold.

Before we continue, I must state right now DO NOT USE THOSE DROPS! EVER!

Now let me tell you why….

In the era of information gathering, everyone is worried about it happening online. Social Media outlets monitoring your posts to find out about your work and family. Search Engines watching what you look for so they can target advertising right at your weaknesses. Beware the Cookies!

But forget online – it doesn’t matter. It’s the bastion of nerds, stalkers and of course the incredibly intelligent, good looking people who read this blog. No, you need to worry about what is happening in reality, and what one company is after – your genetic template.

That’s right, Vicks isn’t interested in curing your cold! They are however interested in your mucus. Because if they get your mucus they get your DNA. And if they have your DNA, then they can clone you. And if they can clone you, then they can murder you, put their clone in your place and then they have yet another operative out there in society doing their malevolent bidding! You had savings? That money now belongs to the Vicks company. You had a job? Now your clone works there, subtly furthering the Vicks agenda. You had kids? They are now your clone’s kids and being raised in the Vicks ideology.

See this guy? He’s now sticking it to your wife.

Those Vapodrops are not designed to cure your mucus problems. They are to signal the company that there is snot to be harvested! When you suck the pill and it dissolves, a tiny radioactive marker is released. You don’t notice it as you are sick and already feel like shit anyway. That radioactive marker is then picked up on by one of the multitude of Vicks controlled satellites orbiting the earth and your location immediately relayed to the nearest infiltration team. Then, as you sleep, the team silently enters your home and, using a mini turkey-baster, sucks all of the mucus out of your nose. Then they hightail it with a vial-full of your precious DNA. This is happening in thousands of homes across the world each night!

So Shannon, that is where your mucus goes when you pop a Vicks Vapodrop lollie. It goes to a secret underground bunker where scientists analyse it and begin preparations to make a Shannon-clone, soon to become one of the ever-growing army of snot-spawned operatives that each day bring us towards a total Vicks-controlled populace and the annihilation of society as we know it!

Shaped just like a lozenge – no coincidence

So next time mate, do us all a favour and just use a hanky eh 😉

I hope this has answered your question.

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The short-lived Season 4 of the US Transformers cartoon introduced (or perhaps jammed in is a more accurate term) a slew of new characters in its 3 episodes. Notably very few of these characters had Earth modes and most of the new Decepticons were weird space animals, showing the direction the brand was heading in. Also new concepts were introduced in these episodes such as Clones.

Two of these characters were the Decepticon Clones Pounce and Wingspan, two of the few Western on-screen G1 toys I have yet to obtain. These characters got a far greater outing in the Japanese cartoon and it’s from Japan that I have obtained the new toy versions of them. So let’s have a look at the LG61 Clones – Pounce and Wingspan.

Pounce – Robot Mode

Now this is what a Clone should look like – not a hint of kibble anywhere to hint at what his alt-mode is (besides the big sticker which we will address later). Nicely proportioned, good colour scheme – quite nice really. Shame he has no guns.

Pounce – Puma Mode

Like many Transformers with a quadruped alt-mode, Pounce suffers from having oversized upper hind legs. Don’t know why this is – you can trace it all the way back to the G1 Predacons. Due to his arms adding a lot of bulk on the underside of his animal mode, he does not look particularly streamlined. I think his legs on the whole are an improvement on the sticks the G1 toy had though. His colour scheme is based on his Headmasters appearance rather than his G1S4 appearance, personally I think the Hasbro colour scheme is a bit better than this.

Wingspan – Robot Mode

The only kibble in evidence here is his alt-modes wings on the sides of his calves. However they are very thin and sit snug against the body so at least the kibble is very minimal. Like Pounce he looks pretty good as a robot overall.

Wingspan – Hawk Mode

There is a good wingspan on the hawk mode, which I guess one would expect considering his name, and the darker purple on them works well. The claws underneath have got decent detail and make it easy for him to balance, even if not very far off the ground.

The Clone Concept

One of the things that irritated me with the LG58 Autobot Clones was that with all the extra kibble that Fastlane was sporting they looked too dissimilar. The Decepticon Clones have done much better here, with only a tiny amount of kibble visible on Wingspan’s legs which you can ignore pretty easily if you try. However like the Autobot Clones, these two sport big stickers which show what their alt-modes are, kinda defeating the purpose of ‘the enemy doesn’t know which is which’ concept. The rubsigns on the original G1 toys was much better.

Overall

I am far more impressed with these two than I am their Autobot counterparts. They are good representations of the original characters and whilst I think Pounce’s Puma mode could have been better, it’s still an improvement on the original. These two will make fine additions to your Generations/Legends collection.